We have all been there, we argue black & blue that it's round when someone else argues nope, it's a square, the weather is too hot or just right, you should set the machine like this or like that, the examples are endless.
I was talking about this top of viewpoints to a client last week and pulled out this image that I've used many times before to illustrate the point.
Most people are so busy arguing their point to make sure the other person clearly see's how they are wrong and you in fact are correct that they don't take the time to truly listen to the other person.
Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood
by Dr Stephen Covey - Habit 5
7 habits of highly effective people
Most people when they are talking are focused on framing their next answer or question or challenge to really hear what is being said. If you don't take the time to really listen to the other person you will miss so much of the information and there is no way you are remotely valuing that person's input to the issue.
Think about it, how certain are you that you truly have all the answers, that you know all the information?
It's the same when there is an accident, or discipline it's all too easy to just to assumptions that you know what has truly happened, that your viewpoint is the correct one when in reality you have only part of the information.
Here was our advice to help you attempt to think about the situation from others view point
- Assume you never have any more than 50 or 60%of the information
- Listen to what others say without trying to respond in any way, just record the information
- Ask questions focused on understanding the other view points & see how this fits with your understanding
- Prepare to be wrong about all the 50-60% of the information you think you have
- Clarify anything you are not certain of
Will this make you perfect at getting others view points? Probably not perfect, but at least 50-60% there.
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